This in my only Son Cory "Cor Cor" born to Cynthia Marlene Monkman and John Jeffery Blair Linklater on July 26th, 1980 @ 2:04 am.
I was told I would have my baby "daughter" some time in July, but it could be sooner the Doctor told me. They didn't really have the ability to tell us what our babies would look like or what sex they might be, but the ultra sound worker told me she felt I was having a baby girl....I was tickled pink about that. I told my family I am having a baby girl. Everyone got together and bought gifts for the baby on its way. I decorated the room all in pink and took pink to the hospital with me for her to wear home......Well next was a shock to say the least!
ITS A BOY!
My little man Cory "Cor Cor" as I nick named him from day one. Cory "Cor Cor" was born with darker more olive type skin being part Native and part Italian no wonder he had nice colored skin. Cory "Cor Cor" had lots of long black hair all down his back, sides of his tiny soft face and his shoulders we just loaded with hair. My son was a very large boy weighing in at 8 lbs 6 ozs and 24.5 inches long. I was so in love with my boy, and I vowed to do all I could to raise him up.
Cory's "Cor Cor's" dad was not a type of man I would have picked to marry, as he pushed me into having sex with him and then I got pregnant due to that reason. Gosh I was 17 years old for heavens sake. I didn't tell a soul of this happening to me. I just lied and from that lie came the fact that my foster parents said "if I was old enough to have sex and get pregnant then I should be old enough to marry the dad" as well. I was so scared of the fact they were making me get married to John (a native from Grand Marias, Manitoba) "Cor Cor's" dad. I threatened them I'd run away on the night before the wedding, so my step dad (Andy) tied me to my Granny's (Rose) kitchen chair (dressed in my two toned long brown dress) the night before my wedding day. That is where I stayed until the next morning when they came and got me and took me to the church to wed John. Both my step parents were holding on to one arm as they escorted me down the sidewalk to the Church (Good Shepard Lutheran).
This wedding took place on October 4th 1980 in Selkirk Manitoba where I was raised. I only remember the lunch that was held after the wedding ceremony. I think I blocked it all out as it was terriflying for me to go through. I was 18 with a baby and married so fast. I now had to stop my schooling as I was a new mom so I quit in grade 10 and moved to an appartment (in Winnipeg) with John my new husband.
In saying all of this my baby son Cory "Cor-Cor" was the most important little man in my life. I soon left my husband behind, as he came home drunk one to many times for my liking. John always wanted to start a fight with me when he came home from getting drunk. I had felt that my marriage was arranged by others and not from my heart and I knew it would never work.
This one weekend I am writting about goes like this:
I had my auntie Mag and cousins Andrea (passed away) and my sister Joanne all at my place for the weekend. John came home drunk and tried picking up Cory "Cor Cor" who was a baby (by one arm) and hurt the baby. I called the cops and by the time they got there John had passed out on the bed and the cops told us to go elsewhere until he the next day when the booze wore off. I called my step parents to come get all of us. They came in and met with the police and took us home with them. I never did go back and soon applied for a divorce from this man. I was still 18 and but I was my own boss again instead of living in a marriage of sadness. They gave us a court document that said "Decree Absolute" says we were legally a single persons away from each other. The result of me not signing the papers, my parents did.
My life had been granted back to me once again. I could now fend for me and my baby son MY WAY....the best way I could find to do this. I asked my foster parents (Verna and Andy) if babysit so I may support my boy. They allowed me to stay with them and my foster mom told me to go out and live my life and she would look after my son. I looked for jobs all over the place and found one job doing siding with Les T. my friend from Petersfield. We had dated before and we had lots in common. He knew I was a new mom and that I needed work to support my boy. He gave me a job learning to do siding on homes all over Canada with him. My foster mom babysat for me and that helped me out.
My ventures were great and I made lots of money for and 18 yr old back then. I came home after a week away and spent every penny on my boy. I was so proud that I (ME) could buy my own things for Cory "Cor Cor". I took my baby shopping and got his diapers, clothing, baby foods and toys. I came home and while I was home I spent every bit of time enjoying my little man. I did everything to make him happy and healthy. My son was growing so much and he was so darned cute. What a handsome little man I would call him and he would smile at me with his cute little smile.
Cory "Cor Cor" would smile so much with such excitement when he laughed at his loving mom (ME)!
I would hold him and rock him to sleep as he was so spoiled by my foster parents while I was away. They made the rules and I did as they told me...I was allowing that same path again CONTROLLED by my foster family as I had been all my life. My foster mom told me what I was to do (when and how) and it was pissing me off. I soon thought ok I am getting out of this house hold as soon as I get some money saved.
I enjoyed the times with my boy so much that I wanted to be with him full time, but I had no money other then welfare and I was not going on that. I had pride and after all this little man never asked to be born into this world...I chose to keep the pregnancy going and give him life. So I as his mom had a job to do and with all my might I would get there.
I have had many of rocky roads along the way...some good, some bad and some I never wanted to talk about....Oh gosh the embarrassment of it all coming out.
All in all SON I LOVE YOU TOO MORE THEN YOU'LL EVER KNOW!
Love Mom
